Mastering Adversity

Mastering Adversity

Embrace adversity.
Smile at it when you see it coming.
Hug it when it arrives.
Wink at when it leaves.
Those times you’re not able to make a decision.. Adversity forces you to act.
Those times you’re questioning a situation.. Adversity is there to provide clarity.
Shortly after that moment of genius which inspires you proclaim a new goal.. Adversity arrives a few moments later, ready to test your fortitude.
Those times you’re not quite sure who’s on your team.. Adversity shows up to hand out ‘away jerseys’.
If want to avoid Adversity – do nothing, say nothing and be nothing.
But for those of us who are unwilling to accept mediocrity – take out an extra toothbrush and prepare the guest room. Adversity will be moving in with you and she’ll definitely bring her friends Frustration, Pain and Failure.
It’s not about what happens, it’s how we respond to what happens.
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Personal Commitments to Continuous Improvement Principles ensuring Sustained Excellence in Information Technology Framework

Aristotle once said “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then is not an act, but a habit”.

I’m an avid believer – a person’s Values and Principles are universally applied and can not be separated. Therefore, our commitment to Excellence must exist in all things.

In lieu of this, I’ve created the Personal Commitments to Continuous Improvement Principles ensuring Sustained Excellence in Information Technology Framework.

Corporate Sustained Excellence – whether Service Excellence, Operational Excellence or Delivery Excellence relies on Organizational and Individual commitment to continuous improvement. Work is “any activity involving mental or physical effort done in order to achieve a purpose or result”. Therefore our commitment to Excellence can not and should not be limited to 40 hours a week.

Excellence can only be achieved if – the Organization and Employees are both committed to Sustained Excellence utilizing Continuous Improvement Principles.

As individuals, we must perform a self-analysis to understand where improvement is needed, create a plan and seek the resources to resolve our issues then commit to continuous improvement principles.

Whereas, an Organization must understand the capacity (strengths \ weaknesses) of their employees, outline a strategy and provide resources which will help them grow personally and professionally.

Some may ask, what happens if you equip the employees and they leave? A better question is.. what happens if you don’t and they stay?

In the next article, I’ll dive into the Continuous Improvement Principles and Sustained Excellence in Information Technology Framework.

 

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What I Really Wanted To Tell My Princess

During a great conversation, I’ve had with my Princess.. she asked..

“Daddy, how are YOU doing? How are you feeling?”

(my heart sank) As a Father.. your Daughters’ questions resonate differently.. I can’t just say “I’m OK..” but I definitely can’t lay the whole burden on Her.

I wanted to say Princess..

Its difficult coming back to reality after all of my recent trials and tribulations..

I think my commitment to excellence and greatness is stronger now – than its ever been.. It’s funny what a near death experience and physical injury can do to your self-perception and world view. My internal conversations are very different now.. I push myself extremely hard and I have very little tolerance for mediocrity. Primarily because I know what’s like to underachieve and be mediocre.. I definitely know the regrets that come along with it.

I remember laying in the hospital thinking to myself.. you’ve been blessed with an awesome Family.. extremely intelligent and Kids.. loyal Friends and you work for the greatest Organization in the world. Being blessed with all of this.. how do you think you’ve done? Quite simply.. I haven’t done my best or anything remotely close.

So maybe.. I work more now.. but I enjoy what I do and I enjoy being a part of something bigger than myself. Has my personal life suffered? Yes it has.. but I’ve had a great personal life.. maybe too great (inside joke). Now its time to reach my potential and in the process.. help others reach theirs.

I don’t think anyone I know truly understands how badly I want all of us to succeed and truly live a fulfilled life. The time for posting fancy quotes or telling others what they ‘should do’ – is over. It’s leadership time.. I have to lead by example. I love to learn and share what I’ve learned, but it’s extremely difficult to help people who don’t want to be helped. It’s even more difficult when you know the potential someone has and refuses to make the sacrifices necessary to reach it..

I didn’t want to turn my cell phone off.. I don’t want to spend extra hours working and learning.. I don’t want to just work and sleep.. Its not exciting, it hurts me and it hurts the people in my life..

But maybe you’d like to answer these questions?

What if I don’t? What if I remained the same? Who would lead by example? Which one of your family or friends would show you.. YOUR DREAM IS POSSIBLE? Who would push you? Who would show you how to do it? Who would make you say.. if HE could do it.. I know I could do it? Who would sacrifice their time, energy and resources – to teach you how to Win? Who would teach you to how to adapt to different environments? Who would show you how to defeat your demons? Who would show you – true success is more than Followers and Likes?

So when I get out of bed at odd hours to work.. When I turn down my friends just to read.. you may not understand.. it’s not for you to understand.

Everyone is blessed.. some know it and take it for granted.. some know it and brag about it.. some know it and do just enough so they don’t lose it.. but there are only a few who ask themselves – how can I use my blessings to help others?

I’ve made my choice..

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Happy 15th Birthday Son.. May You Rest In Peace

Dear Son..

I’m hurting so much right now.. I told myself I won’t cry.. I told myself I’ll be strong.. I told myself I’d turn the pain into fuel.. but I lack strength Son.. I lack fortitude.. I can’t stop myself from crying.. I can’t stop this pain.. my mind can’t stop the pain I feel in my soul.. I remember the day you were born.. seeing you in NICU.. seeing you fight for your life. I remember your Brother asking me.. “Daddy.. why isn’t Nasir moving?”

…tears just keep running down my face..

Son.. I’m trying not to cry.. but I can’t stop crying. It hurts.. it hurts so much.

It seems selfish that I would cry and you’re the one that wasn’t given an opportunity to live out your Dreams..

I guess I’m crying because you weren’t given that opportunity.. I guess I’m crying because I can’t understand why you’re not here. I’ve done many things in my life that I’m not proud of.. but I’ve never requested an abortion.. I could never see myself telling anyone to take my child’s life.

So I’m confused.. what have I done that’s so bad that you were taken from us after spending a few days on this earth.. I can’t stop crying……….

I may not be the best Father.. I may not be the best Man and I may not be the best Son.. but I don’t think I deserved for you to be taken for us.. I’ve done many things in my life.. but I will gladly give my life and every worldly possession – just to give you the opportunity to be a Man.. You deserve this Life.. you deserve a full life.. you deserve to laugh and learn.. you deserve 15 Birthday Cakes.. you deserve a 15 Christmas mornings.. but most importantly.. you deserve the opportunity to create your own legacy..

Your death will not be in vain.. For your 15th Birthday – I’ll make you this promise..

I will create the Nasir Luthas Foundation and which will build Nasir Luthas Medical Centers all over the world. These medical centers will:
– Effectively use maternal \ child health epidemiologic research and scientific information to improve public health programs and policies related to women, children, and families’ health
– Increase awareness of preterm birth and its consequences
– University Scholarships and continuing education resources for anyone who wants to be an Obstetrician and Gynecologist
– Improve pregnancy outcomes for women and newborns by advancing evidence-based clinical practices and processes through continuous quality improvement

You will never be forgotten.. You’ve came from Me and You’ve returned to Me..

Although the tears slowed down.. the pounding in my head hasn’t.. It’s ok.. We’ll fix it.

Happy Birthday Son.. Daddy loves You…

 

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135 Books That Will Add Value To Your Life

“The Only Difference between where you are now and where you want to be – are the things you learn and the people you meet..”

Once I’ve committed to reading more, I ran into a minor issue.. I had no idea which book to start with or which books would apply to me. Growing up, I’ve heard about  – The 48 Laws of Power, Who Moved My Cheese, The Art of War, 7 habits of highly effective people and the Bible.

Anything after that.. I was pretty much on my own and I tend to believe this is a universal issue which exist in many different ecosystems, therefore I’ve decided to share my reading list from Audible and the Kindle app below. Amazon’s customer service policy allows AudioBook returns – should you not enjoy the book for whatever reason and I’ve returned quite a few via Audible’s Customer Service Number. Luckily, the list below – doesn’t contain any of those books.

Eventually, I’ll add the list of iBooks, PluralSight and other book subscription services.

You may want to copy the Book Title into Amazon or Audible, read the book summary and reviews before deciding if it’s something you’d be interesting in reading.

Personally, I majority of the books I read are usually referenced in a book I’ve read or suggested on the bottom of the Amazon \ Audible page. If it has 4.5 stars, I’ll read through the 10 best \ 2 worst reviews before making a decision.

I look forward to hearing your feedback – please email me at dame.luthas@luthascom.stage.site or leave a comment. I’d do my best to respond as soon as possible.

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I Refuse To Accept Your Death..

 

Some traumatic experiences put a dent in our armor whereas others, pierce your armor and hit your soul – let’s refer to these as ‘nuclear experiences’. The initial damage is bad, but the unknown after-effects are destructive. Our survival instincts takeover to preserve critical body organs and mental auto-pilot \ muscle memory keeps us moving… however our souls are left unguarded. This can lead to depression, disease, self-medication and various dependencies.

In a split second, there’s an internal conversation between your conscious mind and your unconscious mind… are we going to mourn or deny it completely?

Where am I going with this?

Within five months… I’ve lost two of the strongest people in my life – Poppy (My Grandfather) and Aunt Dottie. They were two of the most influential people in my life, who have planted seeds of Strength, Relentlessness, Ambition, Vision and Leadership so deep in me that… some seeds have yet to bloom at all. I wanted them to live to see – an amazing return on their investment. Their love was strong, direct and honest… they didn’t accept mediocrity or excuses.

Aunt Dottie was taken from me August 29, 2016 and Poppy was taken from me January 17th, 2017.

I didn’t go to either of their funerals… Although there could be a valid reason for not going to both… they’ve taught me – there are no “good reasons or excuses” … the truth is I was ‘hurt, confused and shaken’… I went into my mental bomb shelter (designed for nuclear experiences) and slammed the door. I refuse to accept their deaths… there’s nothing you can say or do… there’s no quotes or speeches… They are and will forever be here… More alive than they’ve ever been… When you see me… you see them… when the Luthas Center opens… they’ll be right there watching people walk down their corridors – specifically designed to highlight their value to me and the world… I looked in my Grandmother’s face and told her… “she better not plan on leaving me… we have work to do”.

Let me take you behind the curtain…

This mental bomb shelter has been a safe haven for me since I was a child… It’s my disconnection point… I’ve mastered the art of “suppressing mental pain”.. The problem with this is, suppressing pain somehow wipes out other memories that have nothing to do with the pain itself (note to self: look up the psychology behind this)… While in this mental bomb shelter – I change my phone numbers, delete social media accounts and unconsciously sever relationships.

Allow me to digress: Since 2014… my life has been harder than it’s ever been for me… I won’t share all the details now but I’ll tell you this… 2 weeks after moving from a building with roaches, mice, broken elevators, no hot water, police presence and everything that goes with that to a Penthouse apartment on the Hudson River facing New York City’s beautiful skyline, with a concierge, a pool, basketball \ tennis courts, and a gym… I was in a coma for 10 days due to medical malpractice and have been dealing with the aftermath of that experience since then. Including, missing a total of 11 months at work… suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (with associated side effects), a torn MPFL (ACL Damage) and approximately 18 of my friends have been killed… 

My Aunt Diane, who is my Mother’s and Aunt Dottie’s sister has been sent from heaven… She’s a first-class Angel with Gold Wings. During my knee injury, last year and after Aunt Dottie’s ascension to Heaven… she came to stay with me for a while. I can’t explain how much her visit meant to me. The timing couldn’t have been any better… I was on a virtual bungee cord… coming closer and closer to hitting the bottom each day.

Aunt Diane speaks truth while giving unconditional love… She doesn’t tell me to do anything… She suggests and provides a reason for suggestion… I remember one conversation in which she said… “You may not like what I’m going to say to you… but I love you… so understand it’s coming from my heart… Baby, you have to stop running (referring to my mental bomb shelter)”. That statement resonates with me to this day… Although, I don’t refer to it as running… I refer to it as ‘protecting my sanity’.

It is ‘Denial’… I deny ‘mental access’ to the ‘nuclear experiences’ that affect my ability to focus, provide for the people who depend me and drain me of the strength needed to fulfill my purpose. Some would say it’s not healthy, others would say it’s selfish and a select few – completely understand.

When I’m long gone… Remember me as the Man that started off behind the 8 ball… experienced some of life’s best and worst… absorbed it all the same… learned from it and did his best – to give the world the same unconditional love he was given.

If it takes a Coma (and many more traumatizing experiences), sleepless nights, social sacrifice and occasional social disconnections… then that’s what it is. I’ll do it again and again with no hesitation… It was an honor to have them in my life and soon the world will know of their Greatness…

So when you don’t see me mourning at a funeral… it’s because I’m hurt and the only way for me to deal with that pain – is to convert it into the energy needed to continue their Legacy. The torch has been passed… The day the Luthas Center opens you’ll see their faces in Bronze right over the Corridor named after them. Obituaries are fine, but they deserve so much more.

Dear Aunt Dottie

I will always remember when you told me… “your Mother might’ve given birth to you, but you are and forever will be MY Son…” I remember that awesome trip to Disney World… we flew first class on my first plane ride ever… you told me “We fly First Class, because we are First Class” – although I had no idea what that meant then, I completely understand what that means now. I remember having breakfast with Mickey and Minnie Mouse… then going on every ride for the next few days.

I remember those long talks about life which always ended with you saying… “Don’t forget you’re my Son and I won’t tolerate anything but the best from my Son.” Those same countless conversations ended with me saying “I Promise..” Now here I am… A Man… Your Son… saying once again “I Promise I will not let you down..”

Dear Poppy

I will always remember when you told me… “You’re a LUTHAS… You’re my First Born Grandson… but You are a LUTHAS… You are responsible for the LUTHAS name… Don’t ever forget that!” That’s when I looked at you and told you about my plan to create the LUTHAS Center and its purpose. I remember you looking at Nanny and said… “See that’s a LUTHAS!”

I could never stop listening to your stories about how you always went to buy a new Cadillac with cash… then you’d take me for a ride in the Cadillac to get some Ice Cream. The day I purchased my Cadillac Escalade, I remember driving 13 hours straight back to NY just so you could see it. The smile on your face was worth everything to me… then I drove you around in it and got you Ice Cream.

Every day you went to work, I would go to your room… lay in your bed and swear I’m Poppy. Hands behind my head… stretched across the bed looking watching cartoons… after spraying myself with your Colognes… I love you Poppy.

Dedicated to MY Aunt Dottie and MY Poppy…

 

 

 

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Know Thyself – Have You Considered A Personality Test?

For us to know “where we’re going”,  we must know “where we are” and “who we are”. If we claim to ‘know’ something – then we should be able to ‘articulate’ it correctly.

With that being said.. let’s start with being able to answer the biggest question “Who Am I?” Yes we know our names, we know what people tell us – we are.. but the question is still.. “Who am I?”

Here are some truly legitimate reasons for taking a personality test.

It can help inform your career.

Should you be an engineer or a doctor? A social worker or a journalist? Passion is part of the equation, but your personality may also determine what occupation is a good fit.

Take highly sensitive people, for instance. According to Elaine Aron, a longtime researcher of the personality type, HSPs may want to consider careers like teaching because of their service-based nature. HSPs also enjoy quiet workplaces because they don’t like overstimulation, Aron previously told HuffPost.

Additionally, personality tests may also be part of the job hunt. Some companies use the assessments in the application process to help vet candidates, the Wall Street Journal reported. Companies may also offer personality tests during their training process after an employee has been hired as well.

It can help you decide what to study in school.

Character assessments can also help college students as they navigate their area of study. The more you know what your personality aligns with, the better idea you’ll have of what to major in when you go to school. A 2006 study published in the Journal of Vocational Behavior found that students who were more personally interested in what they were studying had an increased likelihood of performing better.

It will help you understand your strengths and weaknesses.

The more insight you have into how you operate, the easier it is to determine what your best and worst traits are — something that can come in handy both personally and professionally.

For example, according assessments based on the Meyer’s-Briggs test, ESFJs, or Extroverted-Sensing-Feeling-Judging individuals, are “caregivers” and work hard to make other people happy. This is a great quality to have, but it may lend itself to being too much of a people pleaser. Strength? They care about others. Weakness? They tend to ignore their own needs.

It plays a role in social interactions.

These quizzes and tests help you connect with others who are just like you, Mitch Prinstein, a professor of psychology at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, explained to NBC News in 2014. “Ultimately, they give you some feedback on whether your behavior is similar to others, what your niche is, and how similar you are to a sub-group of people,” Prinstein said. “That is inherently very rewarding to people.”

It feels good to know yourself.

Chances are you’ve received personality test results that make you exclaim “this is so me” (or, if not, you just take the test again). But why does it really matter what the answers say? Humans like the validation that comes with establishing who they really are as individuals. The more you know yourself, the more you’re able to assert what you really need in life, relationships or otherwise. How else are you going to know what kind of vacation to take or what city you actually belong in?

So storm fearlessly into the world, armed with the knowledge that you’re Type B, an introvert, an old soul or whatever it is that you identify with. Let that personality shine.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If you take a test, be sure to respond to each question – don’t leave it in the middle otherwise you may disagree with some feedback as I did below:

“being impatient with others who make mistakes”. I tend to be understanding and offer assistance to help them resolve the mistake they’ve made as I hope they would do the same for me.

“neglecting the bigger picture.. making decisions without considering all of the possible options” – I look at the big picture all of the time and this requires considering all possible options to make decisions necessary to achieve that goal.

“..have little patience for others who are less competent” – This is completely false.. I know we’re all stronger is some areas than we are in others. Therefore, it’s important for us collaborate to ensure all grounds are covered.

If you or someone you know would like to take a personality test – there’s a free personality test on this website.

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Finding Your Michelle Obama

This article was influenced by a conversation with some of my closer male friends. The discussion was started from a statement in which I said (paraphrasing) It’s not a problem for us to be focused on handling our business.. Women are actually intrigued by Men who not only take care of their basic responsibilities, but excel at handing their business while striving to do better… never forgetting to keep the main thing.. the main thing.

At which point, one of my Friends said.. “I’m looking for my Michelle Obama.”

There are occasions where I’m writing an email or text – and I think.. this response is something I’d like to share with my awesome Luthas.com Leaders. With that being said, the rest of the article is based on my initial response.

First we need to define which qualities / characteristics our Michelle Obama has. It is impossible to find or acknowledge someone (or anything for that matter) – without knowing what we’re looking for.

A few qualities of our Michelle Obama could be, someone who has learned “how to” and \ or mastered the following:

  • Focus on her strengths while managing her weaknesses
  • Smile at adversity because she understands adversities are simply tests of will, commitment and character
  • Minimize time spent chasing temporary things or impressing people who don’t appreciate her time, love and loyalty
  • How to embrace and respect fulfilling moments with close friends and family, rather than disgressing from the moment to get on Social Media
  • Not to judge a Man strictly based on his accomplishments, but on what he’s overcome.. his ambition and his passion for greatness
  • How to be a strong woman, with a strong sense of herself.. who she is and where she comes from
  • To be a good listener.. whether her Man is sharing work related experience, venting about his favorite teams horrible performance, reminiscing on life prior to her, nightmares that woke you up or your horrible singing voice. She soaks all in, digests it, offers her opinion or asks questions.. to show her interest.
  • Companionship.. Keeps you company and stays awake regardless of what you’re watching, from Military Movies \ Documentaries, American History, 4K Action Movies, Dozens of cable series and most importantly the endless SportsCenter replays, Games and Sports talk shows.. to the point where she can probably argue Sports (in your defense) with your friends when you’re not around
  • Knows what you’re feeling before you share what you’re feeling.. from the silence that takes place after your team loses.. to the sighs that mean anything from I’m hungry, thirst, aggregated or sleepy
  • Rarely pressures you to do anything and puts forth her best effort not tamper with your comfort zones
  • Understands your weird obsessions (Blonde, Honey Blonde, or Light Brown Hair, pink lipstick covered by lip gloss, pink nails and red pumps) even though these may not be her favorites.. she does it because you like it
  • Enjoys learning new things, being creative and consistently surprising everyone with her creations
  • Independent enough to want to do everything for herself, but enjoys when you take control and be the Man
  • Mastered cooking, creating new dishes and presenting everything just right on the plate
  • Knows how to shop, save and manage money effectively
  • She’s just as beautiful wearing a scarf with no makeup as she is – when she get’s dazzled up.. which is why she’s able to get ready so fast (can’t beat that)
  • Has strong values and principles that guide her decision making

Now look at it from Her point of view, it’s one thing for her to deal with you and it’s definitely an entirely another thing to keep her.

What kind of Man do we become? A Man who..

  • Can articulate a vision that resonates with people
  • Can enter a room filled with people from different cultural backgrounds – who may be Doctors, Hustlers, Lawyers, Priests, Politicians, Scholars, Blue Collar workers, Athletes, Convicts, Musicians, Intellectuals and Technologists.. adapt to the environment, switch dialects accordingly, establish productive relationships and leave a positive lasting impression
  • Helps her loosen up and feel comfortable with taking risks, not doing things the traditional way and testing it out
  • Be a Man amongst Men – whether its a Barber Shop, Gym, Sporting Event or Social Gathering
  • Be humble – yet confident, never overestimating or underestimating your abilities… or the abilities of the people around you
  • Have a wardrobe compatible for any Professional or Personal function.. whether its Corporate America, Church, the Caribbean, Hanging out with the Fellas, Couples night or a Romantic Dinner at an upscale restaurant
  • Not only have Visions, but Communicate them boldly, committing to their success.. with or without support from anyone
  • Regardless of the bank account balance, approach your profession like a professional, with the same energy you’ve had during orientation
  • Do more than you are compensated for, always offering to help your co-workers, treating the janitors with the same level of respect as you do the Executives
  • Admit to errors in judgement and take the same level of responsibility for your mistakes as you do in your successes
  • Leaves notes around that remind her how special she is to you
  • Can be transparent without fear of criticism, because she is not only your Woman but she is your Best Friend
  • Can say “I Love You..” as many times as possible in a day.. while showing unconditional love and sacrifice
  • Will never stop being appreciative
  • Remembers your job is to Protect, Provide, Love, Teach and be supportive
  • Surrounds himself with loyal people who shares the same vision of greatness
  • Compliments her Quality of Life, values, principles, exceeds her standards, adds tangible and intangible value

The key to finding \ acknowledging your Michelle Obama is simply becoming her Barack Obama. Once you’ve committed to becoming a Great Man and are well on your journey.. your desires.. including your Michelle Obama will be magnetically drawn to you.

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These 4 Investments Will Change The Quality of Your Life

Everyday we positively or negatively – consciously or unconsciously invest in our lives. The results of these investments are clearly seen in the quality of our lives. Being intentional with our early morning investments – increase the likelihood of a happier, healthier, more fulfilling day. Consistently implementing the four investments below, can ultimately result in a better quality of life for you and those around you.

1. Hydrate: Kick-start your body by drinking an entire bottle of water (possibly with Green Superfood) placed there the night before. along with your daily multivitamins

2. Be Grateful: Take (at least) five minutes to recite the things you’re grateful for. Beginning each statement with “Thank You for..” or “I am Grateful for..” .. This exercise replaces any negative internal conversations we would’ve had. Instead of saying “I have to go to work \ school \ etc..” we can say “I get to go to work \ school \ etc..” .. therefore acknowledging the activity as an opportunity versus an undesirable chore. Try your best to recover the excitement you’ve felt during orientation. You can be many things in this world, make sure one of them is “Grateful”.

3. Exercise: Increase the blood flow and oxygen throughout your body by performing whichever form of exercise you enjoy. It doesn’t have to be physically demanding just enough to elevate your heart rate.

4. Emotionally invest: Profess your love to your loved ones. Whether it’s face to face, a call or a text. It doesn’t have to be overly dramatic.. just tell how much you love and appreciate them. How you’ve noticed progress in some areas and how proud you are of them. Expressing love or pride in someone is a priceless emotional investment. People may forget or forgive what you’ve done but rarely forget – how you’ve made them feel.

 

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A Man Never Complains

I’ve decided to incorporate this philosophy within my personal continuous improvement initiative. If I want this new philosophy to work effectively, it’s important to understand the difference between ‘identifying an issue’ and ‘complaining’ – which are both attributed to our Problem Management capacity and skills.

We might not control the problem, but we do have control over our response to the problem. A controlled problem response requires an understanding of the following:

  • Who or what is effected?
  • How severe is the problem?
  • What is the frequency of the problem? Does it often, occasionally, rarely or never?
  • What are we willing to do to resolve the problem?
  • Can the problem be resolved?
    • Yes – proceed with the actions necessary
    • No (this is rare) – turn it into something manageable, use it as a tool to help you grow mentally, spiritually or physically

Usually, we complain just to complain.. as it’s rare for someone to complain to a person – who actually has the ability to fix the problem. Why is that? Mainly because, it’s easier for us to express our dissatisfaction with the problem – than actually fixing the problem.

Improving our quality of life, requires us taking full responsibility \ ownership of our problems and deal with them accordingly… not ‘Complaining’.

Therefore.. ‘A Man Never Complains..’

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From Nightclub Promoter to CEO: The Incredible Journey of Scott Harrison, Founder of charity: Water

After visiting his first nightclub, 18-year-old Scott Harrison was hooked. Soon enough, partying and getting wasted became the norm. Over the next 10 years, Scott became a nightclub owner, earned thousands per month simply for promoting alcohol and hosting parties, and supposedly got “addicted to everything short of heroin”. Today, he has raised $210 million and improved more than 6 million lives. How, given his earlier struggles, did he become the impactful and successful CEO of an internationally renowned organization, charity: water?

It’s just a matter of (gaining) perspective

Unfulfilled by his extravagant lifestyle and burned out by the hollowness of weekly ragers, Scott, 28-years-old at the time, decided to volunteer full-time in Liberia. He constantly dedicated himself to helping others from that point on. Over the following two years, he learned a lot about the value of human life and the struggle millions of people worldwide face in trying to collect water:

“663 million people today don’t have access to clean, safe drinking water.”

Drinking from swamps, sharing water with cattle, and traveling for miles everyday is completely normal for millions of people. Meanwhile, 52% of preventable diseases in developing countries are caused by lack of clean water and sanitation. This deeply affects Scott and he has vowed to do all he can to create change because: “no one needs to drink dirty water. There’s no cure we’re waiting for to arrive from a lab. There’s no mystery. We know how to provide this.”

Using creativity to create change

In charity: water’s early days, Scott had to get creative to gain traction. Using his knowledge about promotion, gained from his nightclub ownership days, he organized a birthday party and raised $15,000 from a single event after charging $20 for all attendees, tempting them with an open bar for one hour. Instead of pocketing proceeds like he did as a former nightclub owner, he used every cent to serve a refugee camp in Uganda. Then, he sent photos and GPS proof to every donor, amazing them with the difference their $20 could make.

“Tell people what you did with their money. Inspire them and they will continue to be generous.”

Over the next 9 years, Scott came up with even more creative ways to fund-raise and mobilized more than 1 million supporters worldwide to raise over $210 million. To date, more than 6 million people across 24 countries have received access to clean water. Scott’s goal is to help 1 million people in 2016 alone.

Building trust, one community member at a time

To what does Scott credit charity: water’s amazing success?

Organizational efficiency

First and foremost, charity: water ensures that 100% of public donations goes towards helping communities in need. Overhead costs and credit card fees are fundraised and stored separately, often through celebrities and corporations.

All of this ensures maximum efficiency and trust in the brand. As Scott explains, about “42% of Americans don’t trust charities” and maintaining an innovative but trustworthy brand is the best thing that a company can do.

Community involvement

Instead of simply sending overseas volunteers, charity: water collaborates with local organizations and individuals to change the local communities. Donors are highly engaged through the help of brands like Saks Fifth Avenue and creative solutions like Virtual Reality films and GPS tracking of project sites. If you donate a well, you could use your VR headset or web browser to monitor the results. This takes community engagement to the next level.

Constant motivation

To drive a movement and succeed at the level Scott has, you have to truly believe in your vision and the impact you want to create. Scott is consistently motivated because he has seen the amazing changes a single well can bring.

People in villages across the world describe life “before the water came” and “after the water came.” Clearly, water has the power to change everything from education to health and interpersonal relationships. This is what keeps Scott going.

There’s always room for improvement

Despite all the success, Scott regrets not having established charity: water’s subscription-based donation model years ago. He views this as a huge missed opportunity. Most donations occur online and instead of having so many one-time donors, charity: water could have had repeat-donors, contributing a small amount every month for an indefinite period of time. Of course, the past is the past but a subscription-model is certainly part of charity: water’s current fundraising strategy:

“If not us, then who? If not now, then when?”

Innovation cannot be stopped and seemingly, neither can Scott. A big part of his plan now is to inspire others to take action. He has already motivated millions of people across the world to learn about water issues and fund-raise creatively, whether through lemonade stands or the Founders Pledge. He stresses that the time for action is now:

“We are living in the most remarkable time in history. If there’s ever a time when these huge problems can be solved, it is certainly today.”

Listen to this awesome Podcast interview where Scott went deep into his history. 

Watch the full talk by the inspiring Scott Harrison, CEO of charity: water, at Startup Grind Europe:

Originally posted on LinkedIn

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Use Internal Conversations to Reduce Unwanted Consequences

Today, I’d like to share a strategy that could help reduce the frequency of unwanted consequences. I think we can agree, we have absolutely no control of the consequences of our actions – whereas we have 100% control over our actions themselves.

The “7 Levels Deep” exercise to helps me understand what drives my thoughts, decisions and behaviors. Here’s an example of how it works.. Instead of simply asking yourself “Should I do xyz?”.. then answering with the first thing that pops up in your mind and going with that. You will ask “Why?” after the first answer.. “Why?” after the second answer.. “Why?” after the third answer.. all the way down 7 levels. At some point, your response will go from your mind to your heart – thereby giving you the real answer you want. Try it and let me know how it works for you.

Before writing any article, I think about the emails I’ve received from you, the things going on in your life and what information could I share to help you. I understand your pain, frustration, confusion, depression, loneliness and fear.

I receive emails from – homeless people using a computer in the library, some young adults who have lost their parent(s) and are having a hard time finishing up high school or college, hospital patients feeling scared and alone laying there in the hospital bed, Single Mothers struggling to find a job – that will allow them get off of government programs, help them move into safer neighborhoods with better educational opportunities for their children, Fathers who aren’t able to properly provide for their families due to limited skill sets or physical injuries, former drug addicts whom have used the strategies on this site to help them commit to a rehabilitation program, military Fathers and Mothers explaining what life is like – being stationed so far away from their children, teachers and school counselors telling me about how they share some of my posts with their students, future Nurses staying up late – studying for their NCLEX exams, employees who’ve received a promotion and are scared to fail, consultants on the verge of losing their jobs when their contract expires, CEO’s implementing my strategies within their organization, and former convicts starting their own businesses using material in the books I’ve shared.

There has never been and will never be a Book, Article, Ted Talk, Podcast, Seminar or iTunes U lesson I complete without taking a note to share with someone.

Two weeks ago I visited the Mediation room in the United Nations building here in New York, outside the entrance there is an amazing quote from Dag Hammarskjold (previous Secretary of United Nations) which says “There is an ancient saying that the sense of a vessel is not in its shell but in the void. So it is with this room. It is for those who come here to fill the void with what they find in their center of stillness.”

As I sat there in the mediation room, I closed my eyes and thought about the opportunity I’ve been blessed with to work for the United Nations. The opportunity to be a part of something bigger than myself, work with and for – amazing people from all over the world. It is my responsibility to give my Team, Organization and Customers – the best version of me. I’ve learned – it’s not the opportunity that matters, it’s how you see the opportunity and what you do with it. I never complain about working or any assignment I’m given.. instead I think about it as an opportunity. There is a huge difference between “I have to do xyz..” and “I get the opportunity to do xyz”. I have the opportunity to support the people who support the world. The hungry children who have just lost their parents and home – have nothing but the UN to depend on.

These type of thoughts they’ve generated internal conversations, which morphed into a massive paradigm change. What are your internal conversations? and how are they impacting your life?

As always, feel free to email me to share whatever is on your mind – dameluthas@gmail.com

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Improve Your Life by Adjusting Your Playlist

Most of my life I’ve preferred waking up to some type of Uptempo Music. It gets me going.. moving and grooving while getting dressed. Until one day.. I began to realize how influential music was to my mood and thought process. It didn’t matter if it was Pop, Hip-Hop, R&B, Gospel or Country (yes I listen to all types of music), there was an influence of types.

I found a tool called YouTube Downloader and began downloading Motivation Speeches, Interviews, etc. it was ok but not enough.

I moved on to Amazon’s Audible and I would’ve never imagined the volume of information I could receive by listening to AudioBooks. To date, I’m sure I’ve listened to hundreds of books. The only issue was an occasional hit or miss.. then I’d call the Audible Support number and request to return the Audiobook. A few seconds later.. my account is credited and I move on to the next book.

After years of listening to Audiobooks I decided to try Podcasts. I can honestly say, Podcasts have become my favorite. I can google a subject – then add best podcast. Google returns a list of the best podcasts in the specific subject. Podcasts are an accumulation of great raw information and conversations. It’s like walking into a room and listening to a great conversation.

I’ve subscribed to over 100 Podcasts but the ones below I think you’d enjoy while getting dressed, commuting, working, cooking or just relaxing.

Enjoy..

 

 

Cognitive Development / Productivity

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/getting-things-done/id999098861?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/tackling-life/id1172503219?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/aoc-social-science-cognitive/id212382281?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/note-to-self/id561470997?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/beyond-to-do-list-personal/id554734474?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/prodpod-productivity-podcast/id447828089?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/productivityist-podcast-ideas/id913414044?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-accidental-creative/id93424211?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/extreme-productivity-kevin/id1080364582?mt=2

http://feeds.castfire.com/itunes:wCclV/10/abc-news-radio/dan-harris-podcast/audio:96.mp3/order:asc/

 

Self Improvement Discussions (High School +)

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/secret-to-success-cj-eric/id844102142?mt=2

 

Leadership and Management 

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-entreleadership-podcast/id435836905?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/dose-leadership-richard-rierson/id595566999?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/project-management-podcast/id79900698?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/people-projects-podcast-project/id302364123?mt=2

 

Social Discussions 

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/ted-radio-hour/id523121474?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-hbr-channel/id280272386?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/tedtalks-audio/id160904630?mt=2

Parenting

https://itun.es/us/qovz9.c

https://itun.es/us/kvVgM.c

Finance

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/so-money-with-farnoosh-torabi/id955939085?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/radical-personal-finance-financial/id896153632?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/smart-passive-income-online/id383084001?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-dave-ramsey-show/id77001367?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/stacking-benjamins-earn-save/id650045209?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/biggerpockets-podcast-real/id594419649?mt=2

Spiritual

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/podcasts-a.-r.-bernard/id414742035?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-potters-touch/id538401206?mt=2

http://feeds.castfire.com/itunes:wCclV/10/abc-news-radio/dan-harris-podcast/audio:96.mp3/order:asc/

Entrepreneurs

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/daily-spark-entrepreneur-podcast/id1136752510?mt=2

 

Non-Profit

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/tony-martignetti-nonprofit/id410006184?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/nonprofits-are-messy-lessons/id1088587697?mt=2

 

Starting a Podcast

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/audacity-to-podcast-how-to/id378425347?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-tim-ferriss-show/id863897795?mt=2

 

General Technology 

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/daily-tech-news-show/id790864884?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/tech-news-today-mp3/id375385132?mt=2

 

Sports

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/jalen-jacoby/id730254722?mt=2

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/order-man-finance-fitness/id979752171?mt=2

 

 

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Improve Your Attention Span and Concentration in 2017

It’s the time of year where we began reflecting on the year, highlighting our Victories while analyzing the areas of improvement.

I must admit, I’m a Serial Reflector and Visionary (if there were such a thing).. constantly looking at situations or things wondering – how can I add value? I’ve learned ‘I can’t give – what I don’t have’ so I must improve.

If we improve.. we’ll be able to:

  • Improve the lives of those around us as we continue to improve our own
  • Show the people who’ve given us opportunities – those opportunities were truly appreciated
  • Be an example of continuous improvement to our loved ones, friends and associates

Self-development requires the implementation of a customized Productivity Strategy – which allows us effectively manage our time and effort. The only difference between ‘where we are now’ and ‘where we want to be’ – is how we spend our time on a daily basis. Therefore, we need to a Time Management Strategy – which allows us to Focus on our priorities.

When I’ve learned adults are only able to focus on a given task area for 20-25 minutes – I knew I needed to find a Strategy that maximizes this limitation.

Enter the Pomodoro Technique.

What is the Pomodoro Technique?

The methodology is simple: When faced with any large task or series of tasks, break the work down into short, timed intervals (called “Pomodoros”) that are spaced out by short breaks. This trains your brain to focus for short periods and helps you stay on top of deadlines or constantly-refilling inboxes. With time it can even help improve your attention span and concentration.

Simply put..

Pomodoro is a cyclical system. You work in short sprints , which makes sure you’re consistently productive. You also get to take regular breaks that bolster your motivation and keep you creative.

The History of the Pomodoro Technique

It was invented in the early 90s by developer, entrepreneur, and author Francesco Cirillo. Cirillo named the system “Pomodoro” after the tomato-shaped timer he used to track his work as a university student.

How the Pomodoro Technique Works

  1. Choose a task to be accomplished.
  2. Set the Pomodoro (timer) to 25 minutes (the Pomodoro is the timer)
  3. Work on the task until the Pomodoro rings, then put a check on your sheet of paper
  4. Take a short break (5 minutes is OK)
  5. Every 4 Pomodoros take a longer break

That “longer break” is usually on the order of 15-30 minutes, whatever it takes to make you feel recharged and ready to start another 25-minute work session. Repeat that process a few times over the course of a workday, and you actually get a lot accomplished—and took plenty of breaks to grab a cup of coffee or refill your water bottle in the process.

Use the Pomodoro Technique to Manage Distractions

If you’re distracted by Family, a Friend, coworker, meeting or emergency – you have the following options:

  • End the pomodoro there (saving your work and starting a new one later)
  • Postpone the distraction until the pomodoro is complete
    • Implement the “inform, negotiate and call back” strategy:
      • Inform the other (distracting) party that you’re working on something right now
      • Negotiate a time when you can get back to them about the distracting issue in a timely manner
      • Schedule that follow-up immediately
      • Call back the other party when your pomodoro is complete and you’re ready to tackle their issue

Of course not every distraction is that simple and some things demand immediate attention – but not every distraction does. Sometimes it’s perfectly fine to tell the person “I’m in the middle of something right now, but can I get back to you in….ten minutes?” Doing so doesn’t just keep you in the groove, it also gives you control over your day.

What do I need to Get Started with the Pomodoro Technique?

A timer is the only essential Pomodoro tool – you can get started with any phone with a timer app, a countdown clock or even a plain old egg timer. Below you will find a number of Pomodoro apps that offer more features than a simple timer offers:

  • Marinara Timer (Web) is a webapp which you can keep open in a pinned tab. You can select your timer alerts so you know when to take a break, or reconfigure the work times and break times to suit you. It’s remarkably flexible, and you don’t have to install anything
  • Tomighty (Win/Mac/Linux) is a cross-platform desktop Pomodoro timer that you can fire and forget – following the traditional Pomodoro rules or use to customize your own work and break periods
  • Pomodorable (OS X) is a combination Pomodoro timer and to-do app. It offers more visual cues when your tasks are complete and what you have coming up next, and it integrates nicely with OS X’s Reminders app. Plus, you can estimate how many pomodoros you’ll need to complete a task, and then track your progress
  • Simple Pomodoro (Android) is a free, open-source timer with a minimal aesthetic. Tap to start the timer and get to work, and take your breaks when your phone’s alarm goes off. You can’t do a lot of tweaking to the work and break periods, but you get notifications when to take your breaks and when to go back to work, and you can go back over your day to see how many Pomodoros you’ve accomplished over the day. It even integrates with Google Tasks
  • Focus Timer (iOS) is a pretty feature-rich timer for iPhone and iPad. You can customize work and break duration’s, review your work history to see how your focus is improving, easily see how much time is left in your work session, and the app even offers a star-based rating system to keep you motivated. You can even customize the sounds, and hear the clock ticking when you lock your phone so you stay on task.

These are just a few good tools to choose from. Don’t hesitate to experiment with others, but remember, the focus of the Pomodoro Technique is on the work, not the timer you use. If you would like an actual tomato timer like Cirillo uses, this one is available for $7 at Amazon. Alternatively, you can buy a tomato timer and a copy of the book together from him directly. If you want Kindle or ePub versions of the book, grab them directly from Cirillo’s store as well.

Will the Pomodoro Technique Work for Me?

If you want to improve your quality of life – effectively managing your time is mandatory.

Remember: The Pomodoro is a productivity system—not a set of shackles. If you’re making progress and the timer goes off – it’s okay to pause the timer, finish what you’re doing and then take a break. The goal is to help you get into the zone and focus—but it’s also to remind you to come up for air. Regular breaks are important for your productivity . Also, keep in mind that Pomodoro is just one method, and it may or may not work for you. It’s flexible, but don’t try to shoehorn your work into it if it doesn’t fit. Productivity isn’t everything —it’s a means to an end, and a way to spend less time on what you have to do so you can put time to the things you want to do. If this method helps, go for it. If not, don’t force it.

Integrating Pomodoro With Other Productivity Methods

Since the Pomodoro Technique focuses squarely on how you do your work and not on how you organize your work, it’s just begging to be remixed with other methods and systems .

  • GTD (aka, Getting Things Done) which allows you to easily use GTD to organize and prioritize—and then use Pomodoro to actually get your work done
  • Kaizen which emphasizes continual improvement over time
  • Scrum which demands flexibility in organization and priority, but still requires results

Many productivity systems focus on organization or specific tools. In those cases, the goal is to help you avoid forgetting things and prioritize your work. Whereas, Pomodoro’s focus is on ensuring you make progress on your tasks, stay focused and get things done without going crazy.

You don’t need other people to get on-board before starting the Pomodoro method because it’s highly personal – It only impacts how you work.

Additional Reading

Now that you have the tools required to get up and running with the Pomodoro system if you want to give it a try. It’s not difficult, and you may find that it helps you focus. There’s more to the picture here, and Cirillo’s book can offer more guidance and specific examples if you need them. Beyond that, here’s a short list of additional resources worth reading:

To a certain point, you can only read so much about the Pomodoro Technique—you have to just try it out on your own and see if it works for you. With luck, it’ll give you a way to be continuously productive while keeping you from burning out. Don’t worry if you don’t rack up five or ten pomodoros in a day: Many people who love the method note you may only get one or two in before you’re distracted by something unavoidable. The upshot however is that those one or two pomodoros may be more productive than anything else you do all day.

Credits: I’ve edited the article found on Lifehacker specifically for my Audience

 

 

 

 

 

 

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To Daddy’s Little Princess..

Dear Princess,

I’ve watched you mature into an intelligent beautiful young lady.

I specifically love your determination, ambition, will power, confidence, resourcefulness and desire to be independent.

As your Father, my job is to protect, provide, empower, teach and love you. Your job is to use your God Given – gifts, talents and abilities to help others and be the best version of you.

Remember to always keep your head up Princess, otherwise your Crown will fall. Always be grateful, humble and never allow anything or anyone to make you feel like you’re anything less than a Princess.. until the day you become a Queen.

With that being said.. the assignments I give you will help you discover your God Given – gifts, talents and abilities.

Research each section and Answer the questions associated with them

 

Here are the Rules:

  1. Find at least 5 different sources of information and add the links to your resources at the bottom
  2. Do you a good job. Review it. Do a better job. Review it again. Do your best job

Influential Women (25% of your Grade) – I’m sure you’ll say WOW 🙂

 

Justice Sonia Sotomayor

  1. Where was she born?
  2. How was she born and raised?
  3. Who were her biggest influences?
  4. How has she influenced the world?
  5. Share your favorite YouTube Video of or about her
  6. Which do you admire about her?
  7. Watch a speech and tell me what part of it stood out to you
  8. Which three of her quotes do you like the most?

Dr. Helen Rodríguez Trías

  1. Where was she born?
  2. How was she born and raised?
  3. Which do you admire about her?
  4. Who were her biggest influences?
  5. How has she influenced the world?
  6. Share your favorite YouTube Video of or about her
  7. Watch a speech and tell me what part of it stood out to you
  8. Which three of her quotes do you like the most?

 Michelle Obama

  1. Where was she born?
  2. How was she born and raised?
  3. Which do you admire about her?
  4. Who were her biggest influences?
  5. How has she influenced the world?
  6. Share your favorite YouTube Video of or about her
  7. Watch a speech and tell me what part of it stood out to you
  8. Which three of her quotes do you like the most?

Oprah Winfrey

  1. Where was she born?
  2. How was she born and raised?
  3. Which do you admire about her?
  4. Who were her biggest influences?
  5. How has she influenced the world?
  6. Share your favorite YouTube Video of or about her
  7. Watch a speech and tell me what part of it stood out to you
  8. Which three of her quotes do you like the most?

Music (25% of your Grade) – since you love singing and music 🙂

The history of “Soul Music”

  • Where did it start?
  • Why did it start?
  • How has it influenced the world?
  • Find three Soul Musicians and explain
    • Three things you admire about them and why
    • Tell me what they’re passionate about
    • Tell me what they had to overcome in life
    • How they dealt with adversity

Organization Research (25% of your Grade) – since you love helping people 🙂

UNICEF

  • Where did it start?
  • Why did it start?
  • How has it influenced the world?
  • Find three Soul Musicians and explain
    • Three things you admire about them and why
    • Tell me what they’re passionate about
    • Tell me what they had to overcome in life
    • How they dealt with adversity

UNWOMEN

  • Where did it start?
  • Why did it start?
  • How has it influenced the world?
  • Find three Soul Musicians and explain
    • Three things you admire about them and why
    • Tell me what they’re passionate about
    • Tell me what they had to overcome in life
    • How they dealt with adversity

Write a letter to your to Future Self (25% of your Grade)

 

Note: The assignment above is an actual e-mail sent to my 10 year Princess as she sat in the living room watching TV.

During my childhood I’ve received assignments from my Mother and my Aunt Dottie. I remember hating to read, research or do any kind of activity other than playing with my friends. I didn’t consider myself a scholar or an intellectual by any stretch of my imagination. Strangely enough, I can count on one hand the friends that haven’t fell victim to extremely unfortunate circumstances.

If we’ve all come from broken dysfunctional homes and have shared many of the same experiences in an environment that breeds negativity and failure, why am I the Man I am today? Why was I the only black male in my high school graduating class? Why do I have a career in Technology, when I didn’t have a computer in my home growing up? Why were my birthday wishes always the same “I wish to be a Great Man, that changes the world and one day have his own holiday?” How I fathom that thought at a point when I’m sure I had no clue was Greatness was?

The answers are abundantly clear when I reflect on the seeds planted by my Family. My Aunt Dottie and Uncle Jerry were scholars who valued education and held positions within the New York Board of Education. If I’m not mistaken Uncle Jerry was a Superintendent (or similar) and Aunt Dottie was a Valedictorian, turned Principal. I don’t know the story, but they’ve managed to get me into PS 166 – an elementary school located in Manhattan’s upper west side. I remember traveling on the train from one of NYC’s outer boroughs to Manhattan daily from Kindergarten to 3rd grade. At times, traveling by myself on the train when my friend didn’t ride with me. I’m not sure why I didn’t stay at that school, but I was exposed to a premier early education experience which was unknown to anyone in my neighborhood.

Although, the rest of my childhood education was obtained in lower income school districts, I was always in the grades’ gifted class. My grades weren’t good and my report card comments, always read “He’s a smart child, but he doesn’t apply himself in class.” Eventually, my Mother created a weekly evaluation sheet in the back of my notebook and requested weekly feedback from my Teachers (needless to say.. I hated it). My grades and behavior improved slightly as I knew – a bad weekly report wasn’t received well (to put in lightly).

My low grades – caused my Family to request I attend summer and night school every year.. while my Family created a slew educational activities (book reports, essays, etc.) for me to do at home. Throughout high school, I participated in various special programs – taking college courses on site and working after school.

The day of the SAT exam, one of my friends came to get me and I had no clue what he wasn’t talking about. I remember him saying, “we have to go to some other school to take a test”. Obviously, I didn’t prepare for this “test”. Once we arrived at the school, I recall my friends making bets on who was going to get the best grades and that ignited the competitor in me. Strangely enough, I did better than all of my classmates – many of whom were light years ahead of me in school grades. When the time came, I graduated early due to all of the credits received in summer \ night school and was the only Black Male in my graduating class.

Needless to say, a high school diploma is normally the ‘end game’ where I’m from. Expectations of anything more are rarely discussed or experienced. All of my college applications were rejected.. so I figured I was home free. Fortunately, (but unfortunately at the time) I came home one day shortly after graduation to find my bags packed. My Aunt Dottie had a Sorority Sister at a Historically Black College in the South, who happened to be the Dean of Admissions. My life was forever changed..

All of the additional various conversations, educational techniques, relentless tough love and support eventually created the Man I am today. Small changes consistently implemented, produced huge results.

The assignments like the one mentioned above, were seeds. Although, some seeds required more time to flourish than others.. they have and will continue to flourish. The seed planting process for my Princess has been modified slightly. Assignments are tailored to help Her learn about strong, successful, influential Women and how they use their influence to change the world.

Although my Aunt Dottie is resting up in Heaven right now.. I can assure you – Her influence will be felt around the world. With tears running down my eyes.. Auntie.. thank you for loving and believing in me.. I will never let you down..

Please feel free to share.

Adversity 101

When you become accustomed to being super productive it’s one thing. When the adversity is more consistent than you are.. The battle changes completely. 
The self-talk changes.. The level of commitment changes.. Slowly your strengths turn to weaknesses because they aren’t used as much. Your focus goes from striving to surviving. Your belief system is challenged.. The paradox is – your adversity will honestly and truly expose you for who you are. 
Life doesn’t stop when bad things happen.. Life doesn’t say ‘let me take it easy’.. Life asks.. “If you really want to be this person you’re striving to be – let’s see how positive and strong you are when the storm comes. 
Let me show you who your support system really consists of. Let me show you.. Motivation doesn’t come from Quotes, Songs or Books.. It comes from Within.. It comes from your desire to Overcome Adversity.. It comes from you experiencing a series of consecutive events within a given period of time. Most of which – you won’t be able to be transparent with. 
However, if you are who you claim to be.. You will make it through the storm.. Not as the same person.. But a new person re-centered, recommitted, refocused, free of the things that once held you back from reaching your true potential. Your lows will force you into survival mode, self-destructive mode or Champion mode. 
From my experience.. It’s been all three.. Champions know when the bottom is closer than its ever been and seek Help.. Personal and Professional. Champions understand Pain can exist in many different forms at the same time and during this times.. Your mind, body and soul will all be tested. But most importantly – regardless of the tests.. Losing isn’t an option.. Adversities turn into Lessons.. Lessons turn into changes… Changes turn into Strength and Ultimately – just when you’ve fought, cried and hurt enough.. You rise. 

I may not immediately be Great.. But Absolutely and Definitely. 

Please feel free to share.

Thank You For The Adversity

Sometimes I jokingly think to myself – maybe God just doesn’t want me to help people in life by showing empathy and compassion. Maybe I actually have to experience many of the hard ships personally, so that I can identify with the people I intend to help. 
It’s already been a rough few months dealing with my recovery and rehabilitation. But I guess, I didn’t realize how good I still had it. 
I watched my Auntie pass a few days ago in ICU. She always demanded and expected the most from me. I remember our conversations.. I remember Her voice clearly saying “you can do better – be grateful but never content.” She never had any kids of her own – but there was no denying she considered me to be Her Son and I considered Her to be my Mother. 
I sat by her Bed and promised her – I would recover and be the Greatest Man ever to walk this earth. I would pass her Jewels on to everyone and we would all strive. 

Two days after my Aunt died.. I slipped in the street – dislocated my knee and ultimately tore my ACL. Now I’m in bed.. Crutches to the side.. Leg Brace temporarily off.. Knee elevated with a bag of Ice of it. 

Using everything within me to stay positive and keep my commitments. Thank you for the advertisity. I will not Lose. 

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God’s Response To My Prayer

I know what you’re going through and I want you to be strong throughout the process. I’ve protected you throughout your life and I won’t stop now. You will overcome this adversity and you will be the Man I’ve created you to be.

I knew the process would be extremely difficult for you, so I’ve sent a few of my Angels to watch over you and keep you strong when you feel weak and alone. These Angels are the Family and Friends that love and support you even when you push them away. They’ve been telling me you’ve been extremely difficult lately, so I need you to calm down – I got you. I know you’re out of your comfort zone and I know you want ‘your’ life back. You need to learn – that life is over. I needed to break you down and build you up with a new improved foundation. 

Do you truly realize how important you are to me. Your acts of selflessness and unwavering passion to help others. I gave you Ambition, Relentless, Understanding and a sensitivity towards people in need. I gave you your Dreams of Changing the World and building Facilities around the world to equip people in need. I gave you opportunities that you know wouldn’t exist – if it wasn’t for my Grace. All these things and more because I Love You. 

I’ve guided your steps and picked you up from your missteps. I’ve designed each of your experiences in such a way that you would be able to identify with My Children. I know you’ve experienced a broad array of extremes but when you sit face to face with someone and say “I understand because I’ve been there before..” – then proceed to sharing your testimony. My Children will be empowered. 

Remember your Purpose Son.. You will be the Man I’ve created you to be. 

– God

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